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Just because I'm smiling, doesn't mean I don't want to hit you in the face.

Just because I'm smiling, doesn't mean I don't want to hit you in the face.

Unknown

Remember that person you thought you couldn't live without? Well, look at you, living and shit.

Unknown
The people who are quick to walk away are the ones who never intended to stay.

The people who are quick to walk away are the ones who never intended to stay.

Unknown

I never gave you a reason to hate me. You're just creating your own little drama of pure insecurity.

Unknown
The most painful goodbyes are the ones that are never said and never explained.

The most painful goodbyes are the ones that are never said and never explained.

Unknown
A strong man can handle a strong woman. A weak man will say she has an attitude.

A strong man can handle a strong woman. A weak man will say she has an attitude.

Unknown
Spend your life doing strange things with weird people.

Spend your life doing strange things with weird people.

Unknown
If you have a problem with me, call me. If you don't have my number, then...

If you have a problem with me, call me. If you don't have my number, then...

Unknown
I've met some pricks in my time, but you sir, are a fucking cactus.

I've met some pricks in my time, but you sir, are a fucking cactus.

Unknown
To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all. - Oscar Wilde

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.

Oscar Wilde
I'm sorry, what language are you speaking? It sounds like bullshit.

I'm sorry, what language are you speaking? It sounds like bullshit.

Unknown
As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
No one looks back at their life and remembers the nights they had plenty of sleep.

No one looks back at their life and remembers the nights they had plenty of sleep.

Unknown
Just chuck it in the fuck it bucket and move on.

Just chuck it in the fuck it bucket and move on.

Unknown
You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them. - Desmond Tutu

You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them.

Desmond Tutu
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too. - Rodney Dangerfield

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.

Rodney Dangerfield
, ,
If you're gonna be two-faced at least make one of them pretty. - Marilyn Monroe

If you're gonna be two-faced at least make one of them pretty.

Marilyn Monroe
I've found the key to happiness. Stay the hell away from assholes.

I've found the key to happiness. Stay the hell away from assholes.

Unknown
It is a very funny thing that the sleepier you are, the longer you take about getting to bed. - C. S. Lewis

It is a very funny thing that the sleepier you are, the longer you take about getting to bed.

C. S. Lewis

Real friendship is all that matters in the face of all the bullshit life throws at you.

Unknown
Having real friends makes dealing with everyone else worth it.

Having real friends makes dealing with everyone else worth it.

Unknown
Fettucini Alfredo is just Macaroni and Cheese for adults. - Mitch Hedberg

Fettucini Alfredo is just Macaroni and Cheese for adults.

Mitch Hedberg
If you wish to forget anything on the spot, make a note that this thing is to be remembered. - Edgar Allan Poe

If you wish to forget anything on the spot, make a note that this thing is to be remembered.

Edgar Allan Poe
From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere. - Dr. Seuss

From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.

Dr. Seuss
She's got bite marks on her tongue from all the things she never said.

She's got bite marks on her tongue from all the things she never said.

Unknown