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It's supposed to be hard. If it were easy, everyone would do it.

It's supposed to be hard. If it were easy, everyone would do it.

Unknown
Expect the bullshit, but never accept it.

Expect the bullshit, but never accept it.

Unknown
How the hell do you wake up dead? - Kevin Hart

How the hell do you wake up dead?

Kevin Hart
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What? Okay, back up. How in the hell do you 'turn up missing'? - Kevin Hart

What? Okay, back up. How in the hell do you 'turn up missing'?

Kevin Hart

The writing is important, but the way you say the line and the pause you give it, the facial expression - all of that is very important.

Arnold Schwarzenegger

People love westerns worldwide. There's something fantasy-like about an individual fighting the elements. Or even bad guys and the elements. It's a simpler time. There's no organized laws and stuff.

Clint Eastwood

Keep feeling the need for being first. But I want you to be the first in love. I want you to be the first in moral excellence. I want you to be the first in generosity.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Hatred and bitterness can never cure the disease of fear; only love can do that. Hatred paralyzes life; love harmonies it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it.

Martin Luther King, Jr.
If my life was a movie, no one would believe it. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

If my life was a movie, no one would believe it.

Arnold Schwarzenegger
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If I can sell tickets to my movies like Red Sonja or Last Action Hero, you know I can sell just about anything.

Arnold Schwarzenegger
'I'll be back' always sounded a little girly to me. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

'I'll be back' always sounded a little girly to me.

Arnold Schwarzenegger
I will not change. Because if you are successful and you change, you are an idiot. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

I will not change. Because if you are successful and you change, you are an idiot.

Arnold Schwarzenegger
My life is not unlike Truman's. I can't go anywhere. - Jim Carrey

My life is not unlike Truman's. I can't go anywhere.

Jim Carrey
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Until Ace Ventura, no actor had considered talking through his ass. - Jim Carrey

Until Ace Ventura, no actor had considered talking through his ass.

Jim Carrey

Don't text or Twitter during the show. Just live your life. Don't keep telling people what you're doing. Also, it lights up your big dumb face.

Louis C. K.

For years, Blockbuster Video has edited movies. Like The Bad Lieutenant, when he's masturbating while the girls in the car are doing the thing. I rented it from Blockbuster and sped to that scene, and it was gone. I called up Blockbuster, and I'm like, I got an erection, and the scene's not there.

Louis C. K.

If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the second part that would have made you sick if you could have heard it.

Louis C. K.

No matter how popular you are as a stand-up - you can go out and fill a 10,000-seat arena and be smart and funny - it's delicate to host an awards show and know where your place is and know that it's not about you, that it's about the people who are nominated, and respect that, but at the same time have your moment to show them who you are.

Ellen DeGeneres
I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen. - George Carlin

I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen.

George Carlin

Like a river flows surely to the sea Darling, so it goes Some things are meant to be Take my hand, take my whole life too For I can't help falling in love with you

Elvis Presley
Wise men say only fools rush in. But I can't help falling in love with you. - Elvis Presley

Wise men say only fools rush in. But I can't help falling in love with you.

Elvis Presley

Hosting the Oscars is much like making love to a woman. It's something I only get to do when Billy Crystal is out of town.

Steve Martin
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'Dirty Rotten Scoundrels' is a good one because it not only turned out, I think, to be a really funny movie but it was also a delight to shoot. We were in the South of France, working with Glenne Headly and Michael Caine and Frank Oz the director - who were just fun.

Steve Martin

I agree with Schopenhauer that one of the most powerful motives that attracts people to science and art is the longing to escape from everyday life.

Albert Einstein
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I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87.

Steve Martin